Wednesday, September 8, 2010


September 7 would have been my mom's 60th birthday.  She passed 6 years ago.  And in all honesty, I really didn't know her.  If you talk to my family, children aren't suppose to know anything about their parent's personel lives.  So I only have a host of assumptions about her.  I can only guess why she only married once or twice and decided to live the rest of her days with just me and eventually alone.  The thoughts of lesbianism crossed my mind.  But that is just wishful thinking into insight of my own existence.  As much as I don't know or understand about my mom and how she grew up and what type of person she was, I still miss her.  I do know that I am exactly like her.  I have gotten more attributes from my mother than from my father.  I have her nose and lips.  I have her love for "different music" which is not solely comprised of black music.  We both have an affinity to travel the world, with no plans whatsoever, and to do it by ourselves.  We both tend to do what we want, even though we consult our friends on what is best.  The odd thing is, that we are both free spirits forced to be confined to a world of black and white.  But the same way she could not be contained, I cannot be either. 

Me and my mom differ in one way, I am way more liberal than her.  While a lot of my Christian friends shun homosexuals and members of faith I embrace them.  While society believes that people labelled with diseases such as bipolarism, schizophrenia, and multiple personality, I belive that this is just another realm of normalty that people cannot understand. 

I got my mother's nappy hair, and her fiery attitude.  Our inability to put up with dumb shit mirrors one another.  The endless dreams we both share is uncomparable.  The void we have in search of helping the disadvantaged is amazing.

I love my mom, and miss her on most days.  I wish she was here, but instead I will just write her in my dreams and journals to make sure she understands she is missed.

Love ya!!!

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